Shining Armour

[saintcorrupted]

There wasn't much left in the world for Drusilla it sometimes seemed. Everyone had left her. Darla was no more, Angelus was lost to her and even her Spike, her William, he had moved on and she could no longer save him.

She drifted through the city aimlessly, her eyes seeing things that weren't there and her mind hearing things no one else heard. When some men talked to her, she smiled serenely and she let them pull her into an alley. They hadn't expected her face to change and their lives to end, but they also didn't taste very good, so she didn't even drink from the last one and instead merely crushed his skull against the ground. It still killed him well enough.

The world was dreary today, but through that dreariness she noticed a presence that sparked recognition. He wasn't there yet, so she stayed where he would be and counted the stars that couldn't be seen. She kept losing count and having to start over, it was quite vexing.

Finally there he was. She was silent when she moved behind him, until she put a hand on his shoulder.

"Hello. I know you."

Comments

[hartandsouled]

After calling quits on Wolfram and Hart, Lindsey knew he had to move quickly before the firm gathered the forces to haul him back. It was only a matter of time before they tried and Lindsey didn't want to be here when they did. So he wrapped up his business in the city, putting away his things with every intention to leave in a few days, and stayed out later than he intended.

Lindsey had no fear of the dark, but he knew enough things lurked in it to be seriously wary. He walked through the alley quickly, wanting to get back to his warded home as soon as possible when he was caught in a very cold grip.

He didn't want to admit it, but he jumped. And spun, and found his heart stopping.

Drusilla. She may possibly be worse than Wolfram and Hart.

"Hello Drusilla." He tried to smile. "If you're looking fur Darla, she left a long time ago."

[saintcorrupted]

"Shh, puppet, don't be scared." She smiled, because she liked that he was scared and she stepped closer so she could smell it better. Her hand reached up to trail through his hair. "I know about Darla. I know she liked you. It almost makes us family."

Drusilla caught his eyes and didn't look away, wanting to ensure he didn't run. She didn't feel like chasing. Only like trapping. "I like your eyes. Do you think they'd look better outside your head?"

[hartandsouled]

Lindsey tried to stay in place even though all he wanted to do was to get away. He did take a step back though, slowly, just so he could get away from that chilling touch. It was different from Darla's, and he wanted none of it.

Drusilla's words about Darla caught him off guard though. Just when he thought he had put her down from his mind, the insane vampire had to drop that in his lap. It almost made him miss what she said next.

It unnerved him but he tried not to show it. "Eyes never look better outside the head. They'll be dead then, and dead things don't look very pretty."

[saintcorrupted]

Drusilla tilted her head to the side, suddenly pouting. "Don't you think I'm pretty at all?"

Once more she stepped forward so she could stand close to him, putting her hand on his chest so she could feel his heart beating.

"I'm very dead. I was alive for a long time. In the past. In the present. In the future too. But I'm dead."

She looked forlorn for a few moments, then suddenly she smiled again. "I will leave your eyes where they are. I like them there. I want them to see so much more. What do you see now?"

[hartandsouled]

"No, Drusilla," Lindsey said kindly although his heart under her hand beat at twice its normal speed. "Vampires are undead, that's different."

Prompted by her words, he looked around him and was surprised to find himself standing in the midst of a massacre. Just what he needed before he skipped town. He hoped he wasn't about to be added to the bodies.

"I see a lot of bodies. Now those are dead, they're not very pretty, are they?" He took another step back. It put his back to the wall, but he was out from under Drusilla's hand.

[saintcorrupted]

"Oh, those are gone, you shouldn't care. And they were bad people. They wanted to hurt me. They thought I'm small and weak and could only cry, but I made them cry instead and then I killed them. They didn't taste good. But they wanted to hurt me."

Her eyes were wide and she moved closer again, but this time she kept her hands by her side, not reaching out for him. Not yet. "You'd never hurt me, Lindsey, would you? I don't want to hurt you either."

[hartandsouled]

If Lindsey didn't know what she was, or even if she wasn't batshit crazy, he may feel something for her act of innocence. But things were different when he knew she could do a lot of damage to him with just one finger, and that she was certifiably insane enough to want to didn't help.

"No, I would never dream of hurting you You're a very special person. Are you out alone?" Lindsey didn't know if he would rather she had a companion around or not, but it seemed like a better idea than being alone with a crazy vampire.

[saintcorrupted]

"I'm all alone. I'm out alone and I'm alone inside as well." Perhaps it was an act, but she sounded sad. She reached out to put a hand on Lindsey's shoulder and then she moved closer, so she could lean her head against his chest. She let herself melt against him, listening to his heart beat.

"You can do such great things. I can see it. All this paper weighing you down." Drusilla shook her head and moved away just enough to look at him. "Do you want a crown, Lindsey? I think you could be king. I think you could slay dragons. Do you want to be a king?"

[hartandsouled]

"No more paper," Lindsey agreed while he stood incredibly still with a vampire using his chest as a pillow. It made him miss Darla all over again, and despite the situation, he extended a hand up hold Drusilla to him. Her hair was incredibly silky between hits fingers.

"I don't think I'm made to be a king, darling, and I quit Wolfram and Hart." It felt surprisingly good to be able to say that out loud.

"No more monsters and no dragons. I'm just going to go." He looked at Drusilla and he didn't feel so afraid anymore, just freed.

[saintcorrupted]

There was a tiny sigh when he touched her hair, a happy sigh. She might be strong, she might be powerful, but right now she liked being in his arms as if he could protect her. She rocked herself a little in his arms and finally she met his eyes again.

"You're going to go," she agreed, readily enough, "You're free. But freedom is nothing alone. Will you go with me? I can show you what freedom really means, Lindsey. And you can show me your strength. I need someone strong. My knight has left me."

[hartandsouled]

Lindsey's brows creased at the invitation. Before he may honestly consider it, but now that he was out, he simply wanted to leave this place. Getting dragged back in by drug Drusilla didn't sound that inviting.

But at least it sounded like the crazy vampire wasn't going to to kill him anymore.

"You're looking for the wrong person if you think I can be a knight. I'm no knight." He sighed and looked at Drusilla with slight feeling of pity. Angelus really did a number on her. "Let me go, Drusilla."

[saintcorrupted]

"I know..." She reached up and put a finger to his temple, turning her hand a little. "I know your thoughts. I can smell your fear, but I know what you think as well. Crazy Drusilla. Poor Drusilla. All out of her mind. But I'm not completely out of my mind, Lindsey. I just see things that others don't. I know things that others don't. I'm not weak. I'm strong. And I can see that you can be strong too."

She reached up further, running her fingers through his hair. "I'm not just crazy. I can talk sense. I make more sense than people realize. And I can see who you are. I can see who you could be. We will free you from them and we will go where you want to go. Don't you believe me?"

[hartandsouled]

Lindsey knew about Drusilla's powers. She was a seer, it was why Wolfram and Hart held an interest in her for a period of time while they had Darla. Knowing that added more power to her words, and admittedly it piqued his interest.

"What exactly do you see?" He reached out and carefully placed a hand on Drusilla's shoulder to draw her back in against him. His pulse was still running rapidly, but it calmed down a lot more than when he first walked into the scene.

[saintcorrupted]

"I see that knowledge is power. And it's knowledge that I have and power that you seek." Drusilla let him pull her close, she very readily sunk against him, eyes closed as she slid her arms around him and whispered, just loud enough for him to hear. "Hell's coming. Hell's all around us. Here in L.A., it's coming."

She was trembling, but only slightly, her grip on him loosening, until she pulled back so her hands could run through her own hair again. "You can be so much, if you let me. So much more than just dead. Do you want more than death, Lindsey?"

[hartandsouled]

Hold on for a second. That sounded like she wanted to turn him, and that was the last thing Lindsey wanted. He managed to survive five years at Wolfram and Hart without getting turned, that wasn't going to happen after he left the damn place.

His heart pounded with that realization and he tried to think of an exit plan. "I know Hell's coming. Trust me, I know and I don't plan on being here when it does. That's why I'm leaving." He paused and looked down at the bodies around them with mild distaste. "From here as well before I need to defend myself for murder. You should go look for Darla, or Angel even." But leave him alone.

[saintcorrupted]

"Angel would kill me. Don't you know that? He broke me into little pieces and then he made me and now he hates what I am." Drusilla pulled away from Lindsey, stroking his chest before suddenly poking it twice with her finger, not sharp enough to really hurt, but definitely enough to not go unnoticed. She looked at Lindsey, eyes wide and her voice just a whisper. "You're shot, Lindsey. Two shots. Can't you feel them yet?"

[hartandsouled]

"Angel's good at that," Lindsey said although his vehemence towards the souled vampire wasn't what it used to be. A lot changed after he got his hand back and Darla leaving him, he just couldn't find as much to hate about the broody vamp anymore.

"And what are you talking about?" He resisted the urge to rub where he was poked to get the sensation of her sharp fingernails off his chest.

[saintcorrupted]

"Oh, do you need everything said plainly?" For just a moment Drusilla sounded as exasperated as people tended to be with her, but from her point of view, it was a similar annoyance. "You'll die. You'll be shot. Bang, bang and no kisses. Is that what you want?" She still rubbed his chest, touching two spots more than anything. "It's because no one can trust you. But I'd like to trust you, Lindsey. Won't you let me?"

[hartandsouled]

"What?" It took a few seconds to process that she was telling him about his death. Lindsey stared back, stupefied, and tried to wrap his mind around it. Shot. By muggers? Assassins? Wolfram and Hart could very well send some after him if they haven't already. If it's because people didn't trust him, it didn't sound like muggers.

"And how can you help me, Drusilla?" Lindsey whispered, the subject requiring quiet tones.

[saintcorrupted]

"I can help you not be where you would be. I can help you not be what you would be. Not do what you would do. How do you want to live, Lindsey, and how do you want to die? You learned so many paragraphs." She moved her hands up, wiggling her fingers around his head before combing them through his hair instead. "One tiny note in a small paragraph and the book you're in won't be about you. But you can be more than that. You can be a whole book. Or we can burn all books together."

[hartandsouled]

Either way, avoiding the possible Wolfram and Hart assassin that Drusilla was talking about in his future sounded like a good idea. Not being where they could kill him was an excellent idea, and since it didn't seem like that meant him joining the dead, or undead, yet, he could go along.

But before he did, he had to figure out some answers first. "Why would you want to help me?"

[saintcorrupted]

"Because I'm alone and if I help you, I won't be. Darla liked you. You're almost family." It seemed like enough reason for Drusilla. She took Lindsey's hand now and simply pulled him along, walking over the corpse of one man and then moving aside for something no one but her could see. She lived in a strange world, but usually it at least made sense to her.

"Why don't you want to be made?"

[hartandsouled]

At least she knew Lindsey didn't want to be turned, which didn't mean much if she wanted to force the issue, but was still better for now. He let her lead him on her strange walk, a part of him curious about this pitiful vampire. The mention of Darla plucked at another heartstring.

"From what I know, being turned means I'll die and a demon live on in my body. I still want to live. It's kind of why I quit my job." But he wondered why he was letting a crazy vampire drag him into the night if that was the case.

[saintcorrupted]

"Then you know nothing," Drusilla told him, her voice a bit of a sing-song, "Don't worry about it, Lindsey. Most people know nothing." Compared to her, who knew a lot of things, even if some of time might just be plain insane, everyone else really was lacking.

"You lose a little, you gain a little, but you're still yourself. Just different. Stronger." She turned around and smiled at Lindsey. "I know so much, so I didn't lose a lot. I'm still in pain, like Angelus wanted. I'll always be in pain. But I can love, too. Can you?"

[hartandsouled]

"Vampires can't love," Lindsey said automatically. It was why Darla left, because she couldn't love him after losing her soul. At least, that was what he believed all these weeks since she disappeared.

He stopped, or at least, he tried to if she wasn't pulling him along. "And I guess that's the bottom line, as tied down as it is already, I don't want to lose my soul."

[saintcorrupted]

"Can't love? No, no. That's a lie they like to tell themselves. If I didn't love, I wouldn't hurt. You should meet my Spike. He does nothing but love. Loved so much that I wasn't enough any more and now he's not mine. Just ash." Drusilla shook her head and sighed, turning back to look at Lindsey. "Don't you worry about your soul, Lindsey. It's not yours at all anyway. Might as well be gone." She stopped and once more put a hand on his chest. "All you have left to give is your heart. Why weren't you more careful with it?"

[hartandsouled]

Lindsey stiffened at the rude reminder of his stupidity of selling his soul to move up the ranks. He was leaving the job anyway and still had to find a way to get that back. Assuming he survived the leaving.

"You're right, I made the mistake of signing it away already, I'm not going throw away what I have left of it." Idly he wondered if Wolfram and Hart knew that Spike was dusted. It did explain why Drusilla was wandering around lost.

[saintcorrupted]

"You can't throw a soul away. You can lose it and you can sell it, you can kill it and you can destroy it, bit by bit. Mine is broken. If they brought it back it would cut into me with all the sharp edges." Drusilla hummed as if that possible fate didn't disturb her overly much. She turned around to Lindsey, not stopping and not letting go of him.

"Lindsey... Do you think I'm pretty?"

[hartandsouled]

The question caught Lindsey off guard and he took a second longer to reply. "I think you are."

Lindsey sighed at how swiftly she changed the topic on him. Her mind jumped in from fragment to fragment, keeping one conversation going well be difficult. He tried to pull free and realized leaving was going to be just as challenging. "Drusilla, you know what I mean. Or maybe you don't, but I am not looking to get turned."